Buddy comedies, urinal culture, foxes and hedgehogs

Discussed in this Wednesday’s National Post article:

• films as central metaphors with Tucker
• disgusting urinals with Marie
• the difference between hedgeghogs (people who know a lot about one thing) and foxes (people who know a little about many htings) with Starlee Kine.

On an unrelated note, in Life is Lovely, Jonathan kept on emphasizing the second syllable in Starlee’s name, making it sound like he was saying “Star Lee,” as if it were an Asian surname or something. Sometimes I think he changes the inflection on words as a joke to himself, or because he has an MFA from Concordia and has thus transcending plebian pronunciations. 

Anyway, check out the article here.

My apologies to Ms. Polygon, who does, in fact, exist

Oh. Well looks like Ruby, Starlee Kine’s intern, is a real person. Sorry about that. I guess I denied it out of jealousy. If I could’ve been Jonathan Goldstein’s intern at 16, I think I could consider myself fulfilled. Although the intern position at Wiretap is perhaps more ill-fated than the Defense Against the Dark Arts position at Hogwarts. (Was that okay? To make a Harry Potter reference? Do Wiretap fans like Harry Potter?)

Anyway, this week’s episode drew heavily from National Post articles. The show kicked off with some diary entries about Tucker spitting in his own coffee, mohawks, souvlaki and Jonathan in a bathing suit.

These thoughts originally appeared in the articles “Get out of my dreams, get into my copy store” on June 11, 2008 and “The Truth about Spats and Dogs” from June 4, 2008.

The monologue rolled right into a conversation where Jonthan quizzes Tucker about his everyday surroundings.

In the next bit, Jonathan mentions MELBA TOAST, stating “After spending an hour eating breadsticks and melba toast over the sink while reading grocery circulars, I come to the conclusion that my life, too, lately has become more than a little stagnant.”

This rolls into a three-way conference call with Starlee and her intern, Ruby. Some material from the July 23, 2008 “How to buy cottage cheese” appears in this bit.

Jonathan re-introduces himself to Ruby as Starlee’s “older gentleman friend.” I’d like to someday introduce myself as that, rather than so-and-so’s “scrappy sidekick.”

Lastly, Gregor eggs Jonathan on to take dance lessons. In case you were wondering, Goldstein’s signature moves are the robot, “stir the pot” and “shuffle from foot to foot” and “throw in some kicks.”

The episode closes out with Jonathan learning the Soulja Boy dance from ZouZou.

As an aside, this is the first episode which I recorded myself. If anyone missed it, I’ll email it to you or something. Because I have nowhere to host it. And SuperNintendoChalmers will have tomorrow, hopefully.

(Psst. Just joking. Check out the summary to listen.)

Ruby Polgyon on Wiretap??

So, looks like that Ruby Polygon bizness was relevant after all. This Sunday on Wiretap: an all new episode entitled “Life is Lovely,” featuring Starlee Kine and her intern, Ruby Polygon.

Check out the 30 second promo.

If you don’t have real player, download it here.

So, I’m still maintaining that Ruby is not a real person. Even though there is cross talk between Starlee and Ruby. I’m attributing that to radio magic.

On another note, while SuperNintendoChalmers has been doing an excellent job at making Wiretap possible for non-Canadians, I’m going to begin recording episodes myself. Just in case.

Yo.

So, the new month has started, and, maybe a new season of Wiretap? I don’t know, the schedule hasn’t been posted yet. Color me antsy. Do they have Labor Day in Canada? What up with this.

Anyway.

Since this has practically become the Unofficial Starlee Kine blog, here is something for all you Starlee Googlers:

This is a mention from a May 14, 2008 National Post article by Jonathan Goldstein. You can’t find these online after awhile. Unless you want to pay 2 dollars. The headline was called: “Learning to be our own best friends; And more of life’s little white lies”:

Sunday. Starlee tells me how she met a woman that morning who was cursing a pile of laundry on the street.

“She couldn’t carry it all home so I helped her,” Starlee says.

When they arrived at her house, the woman told Starlee that she was lonely as she’d only recently moved to the city and had no friends. Before they parted, the woman asked for Starlee’s phone number, which Starlee gave her — correct, all but for the last digit.

“Changing just one number made it feel like a smaller lie,” she says.

As you get older, making friends becomes more difficult. Even keeping them does. And so you end up having no choice but to start enjoying your own company more than you might otherwise be inclined. I am reminded of John Candy in Spaceballs where he played a Chewbacca-like character named Barf.

“I’m half man, half dog,” he said, “I’m my own best friend.”

That woman with her laundry, me, Zouzou — perhaps all of us — must all learn to become a little more like Barf.

More Summaries

Hello

I’ve updated with the following summaries:

• How I Became So Hostile
• Behind the Curtain
• A Fresh New Voice

I added the last one because about 66 percent of our hits lately have been people googling Starlee Kine and this episode has her playing an unhelpful customer service rep who won’t let Jonathan return his shrunken pants. Also tune in if you’d like to hear Jonathan and Gregor singing “Shaft.”